Ah, vacation time without the kids, the routine, the middle of the night “mommmeeee!”
How much we learn to appreciate the little bits of respite we get!
In our stressed out, busy, overscheduled lives, sex tends to take a back seat to the rest. There’s always tomorrow. But sometimes one tomorrow turns into 30 tomorrows or more. The result: a feeling of distance in the couple, loss of intimacy, and sometimes sheer frustration.
To be honest, in my clinical practice it’s often the woman that complains of fatigue, and just not being in the “mood”. Usually, she seems to have so much going on without the ability to just
“let it all go.”
That’s what vacations do to us, they force us to let it all go.
This is not to say that overworked, tired men also misplace their libido, until vacation time.
So now it’s time to plan that perfect getaway.
Choose your destination and pack accordingly. But don’t forget to pack your dormant libido along with sexy lingerie, lubricants and any other “toy” you might like to tote. Once you reach your destination and you feel comfortable that your kids are in good hands, your libido will come out of its sleeping state. It’s no longer about tomorrow, but about today, and another Today, and maybe another.
Many times I have heard this line: “Ah, we’re finally back on track!” Yes…sort of. Once vacation is over, the routine, the fatigue begins anew, and then more Tomorrows. But it doesn’t have to be this way. Couples need to build in “mini” vacations into their lives – even if for a few hours at a time.
Don’t forget the couple you are. This takes planning of course. Many people hate the idea of planning for sex. But isn’t that what we do when we go on a vacation? And isn’t the sex great? So no need to resist planning for sex, because after all, if you don’t (just like planning a vacation), you may go nowhere.
You can plan your mini vacation at home. Send the kids to Grandma’s, prepare a romantic meal, have a luxurious bath, light some candles, and RELAX. Even if your libido feels dormant, once you begin, I promise it will spring to life. So if you want your vacation sex to last, Plan, Let go, Accept the realities of your life, and stop Yearning for what was and do something to bring the PLAY back into your couple.